Every relationship that deeply matters to both partners will reach The Brink sometimes.
Many people feel afraid when they reach The Brink because they were hoping to avoid it. They want to make choices, but not under so much pressure.
But there are advantages to being here. For one, the view from The Brink is great.
The Brink is a gift. From here we can see what really matters. Seeing clearly what we have at risk, what we stand to lose, shows us the worth of what we already have. This is why we need to pay attention, need to keep our eyes wide open, when we’re here on The Brink.
The Brink is a point of decisions-necessary decisions. This is where we can decide with clarity whether to protect what’s precious to us, whether to reclaim what was ours, or to move on. Whatever decisions we make at The Brink, we can make them with much greater insight and confidence than we could before.
What do you do when your relationship reaches The Brink? Do you give yourselves one more chance to reclaim what brought the two of you together in the first place? For this, you have to be willing to look beyond current problems. You have to get in touch with parts of you and your partner that you’ve lost sight of.
You have to be willing to learn-and relearn-who you both are. Then you can see whether or not you are both prepared to make your relationship work.
Do you want to know for sure what to do about your relationship at its time of crisis? Step up to The Brink. Distractions and illusions can quickly fall away. Look at what’s really happening between you. You can remember who you really are, not just who you think each other have become. At The Brink, you have the greatest insight and ability to do something about your relationship.
As professionals who have practiced marriage counseling for many years, we find that we can save marriages when couples accept that they need marriage help. If you feel that couples counseling can help you, you are already looking past the problems you face and are ready to revitalize your life through your relationship.
- Paul Maione, Ph.D., and Melissa Bridges, M.S., family therapists
